Fathers and their children have a unique relationship, one that each hopes is built on trust and respect. What can you do when you feel your kids have lost that respect for you? Can you ever get it back?
In one of my other blogs, I mentioned that kids process bad behavior and events faster than the good ones. Keep that in mind when your child behaves disrespectfully towards you.
Some examples of why your child’s attitude can get bad over time are:
- Rules without relationship. That is, being too strict or harsh and not connecting heartfully.
- Inconsistency. Mom and Dad confuse their children when all they do is disagree when it comes to the rules.
- All you say to them is “no.”
- Discipline with level 10 anger.
- Unrealistic expectations. Again, TOO strict is a thing.
- Favoritism or comparison.
- Never admitting when you are wrong.
- Hypocrisy, example; ‘Don’t text and drive but it’s okay when I do it’.
- Not allowing your child to speak up.
- Demanding respect.
What To Do if Your Kid is Giving You Disrespect
If you read those examples and identified with any of them, know that you need to change a few of your ways in order to be respected without actually demanding and asking for it.
Consider these tips:
- Don’t take it personally. I know this is very hard, but keep in mind that when you feel disrespected, it’s because your child is growing, going through something, and possibly seeing these behaviors elsewhere.
- Be prepared. If it already happened once, know it’s not the last time. It’s part of growing or being a parent. Consider all these tips in order to make the disrespect less frequent.
- Plan ahead and avoid arguing/fighting. If your child says something rude and tries to pull you into a fight, make it clear that they are doing wrong, and walk away. Go outside and take a breath.Do whatever relaxes you the most.
- Be determined. If you care about you and your child’s well being, give your best effort in changing the negativity.
- Be a teacher and a coach. Remember that your kids are looking up to you and that you are their first example in life. Give them tips and advice whenever you have the chance, and if they seem to be going through something, let them know that you are there.
You, as a parent, need to guide them and teach them right from wrong. This will lead them to a healthier, successful life. I know it can get overwhelming, but it will all be worth it if you keep your head up.
About Brass Balls Tender Heart | Counseling for Men and Fathers in Denver, CO
Bryce Mathern, LPC is a men’s therapist in the Denver metro area. As the owner and founder of Brass Balls Tender Heart Counseling and Coaching for Men, Bryce helps Dads gain respect, live boldly, and fine tune their sensitivity in order to create amazing relationships. Ready to start making a new life and getting everything you want? Click here to find a time for a session.