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Bryce Giron Mathern: Welcome to the Man for Real podcast. We are here to celebrate men as well as talk about how all men can do better and lead our world to a healthier place. Get ready to get real. Hey everybody. Thanks for being here today. It’s good to have you. Today I’m talking to Ty Humphreys. I’m to talk to him about his journey and his upbringing, some of his religious backgrounds, and to just get into some of the struggles that he’s had. It’s led him to be developer… ⁓ organization called whole man.org. He’s going to be here today to help us understand how we can work through suffering. Ty Humphries. Welcome to the podcast. Bryce, it’s a pleasure to be here. Thanks for having me. Yeah, it’s great to see you, man. It’s good to spend time with you. So I’d just like to start with a general sense of you and your journey of manhood, how that’s gone for you. Some of the highlights, some of the maybe some of the lowlights, just some things that have happened that have impacted your life. and led you to this point. So, you know, our listeners can get a sense of you. I know a little bit about you. I don’t know a lot about you. I know a little bit about you. And so I’m just curious if that feels good. can start to start there. Absolutely. Yeah. I’ll try and pick through the last 40, 41 plus years and give you a quick synopsis. I was born in San Diego, California to two loving parents. Grew up with two siblings, I’m the oldest of three. And we were a, what I would call a pretty religious family. Although I didn’t really know that growing up. thought, I thought we were pretty, for lack of a better term, normal. Yeah, just, just normal, I guess. Church every Sunday, usually also on Wednesdays. Yeah, so grew up in the Christian religion. Nondenominational is what it was called. And… Looking back on those young years and even all the way up until only probably three or four years ago, that religion had a major effect on my life, both positive and what might be referred to as negative. When I was 10 years old, we moved to Colorado Springs. My parents both worked at Focus on the Family, which may give some context as well, which… It does. Yeah. Yeah. For people who don’t know, Focus of the Family is a pretty conservative Christian organization in Colorado Springs. Yes. And that’s an interesting thing to me, again, growing up totally normal and something that my family was very proud of. My parents were very proud of. And, you know, that’s something that I’m working through and kind of getting new perspectives on as I step into my own power and my own consciousness and kind of sort through. what all of that actually means to me now. So 10 years old, moved from San Diego to Colorado Springs. So I would say that Colorado is kind of where I spent most of my more cognizant developmental years. High school, played football, played hockey, had some really formative experiences there just in the sports world with coaches and kind of getting what I would call a stereotypical American masculine. perspective of what a man should be and is. And yeah, that really formed a lot of my perceptions for later years. would you describe that? How would you describe that? Like, you know, I played football too, so I have sense of what you’re talking about, but I’m just curious, in your words, how would you describe that sort of typical American masculine idea? Yeah, I would say that it was a total deletion. of emotions. was a grooming to be willing to suffer without any kind of openness or communication about what was going on. Any type of what would have been called whining or emotional expression would have been shamed. And I just learned like, ⁓ okay, that’s, that’s not what a man is. And so that’s not what I’m going to do. And that perspective was, that was reaffirmed. in many other places in my life. In my family, that was kind of the norm as well. Even though both of my parents were psychologists and counselors, emotions still were not a safe place, which is pretty intriguing for me to recognize. Do they ever talk about them? Do they ever talk about emotions? mean, just that’s like their orientation. Yeah, it’s interesting. We would have family meetings and I think that was their attempt at talking about emotions, but it was all so intellectual. It was all so structured and contained. There was no availability for just raw emotion in my experience. I think perhaps my brother and sister have a different experience from the little bit that I’ve gotten to talk to them about their experience of their childhood, but… And part of my recognition there is that I was the firstborn. And I think there’s, I think there’s something to that. I see a pattern even in my firstborn where parents’ fears seem to be transferred to the firstborn more heavily than the latter, which to me only makes logical sense. First time you have a child and you’re like, ⁓ my. Gosh, this thing is totally dependent on me. have no idea what to do. I’ve never done this. And beyond that, I was deeply wounded by my own parents. So I don’t want to do that. And now all of that fear I feel like is without real intention is very easily transferred, especially to a first born. Yeah. Yeah. So you want me to keep kind of going through. Yeah. So I get really curious about, so there’s the sports thing. I get curious about how. the religious upbringing impacted your sense of yourself as a man or even just as a human being, obviously, maybe more specifically, like how that informed you is like, I’m a person, I’m a man. And then there’s this whole kind of dogmatic system that you’re being inculturated into. And then you have to come out of that and it makes some sense of it. And I’m just curious, like what that was like for you. Yeah, that’s a deep question and to me it’s one of the, the answer to that question is one of the most foundational healing points for my whole journey to this point. To be told when you are, I mean, as early as you can understand language that there’s a place called hell and if you don’t do things right, if you don’t say the right prayer, if you don’t behave the right way, it’s very possible that you could spend. eternity in a place of horrific torture. You and I, as full-grown adult men with fully developed brains, we can, we have ways to rationalize through that and kind of protect ourselves from that. But a small child, that is, I honestly don’t think that we can really understand the effect of that. And that has been a big part of my awakening and emergence. is exploring that more and considering how that really affected me. And some of the ways that I can clearly see, it seems like such a foundational deep stab at my value. And it’s so interesting because what I was always told was, oh no, you are infinitely valuable. You’re so valuable. Look at what Jesus did for you. He died for you. Yeah. And yet the underlying premise is he had to die for me. I’m that horrible. I’m that evil that he had to die for me. And if he didn’t, I would absolutely be going to hell. And, and then on top of that, if I didn’t say the right thing or believe the right thing, even though he died for me, I’m still going to go to hell. And the effects of that on, on my brain. were just so detrimental. spent, what I recognize is I became someone who traded my authenticity for acceptability. And it seems to me, looking back on it, so obvious why. For that seed to be so deeply rooted at such a young age, it’s like, oh, fuck, I better do things right here and I better comply. with what’s going on here. And then to add on all the other realities of life, the sorrows and the traumas and the fears, all of that, I just started to build this story. Like this place is not safe and I need to fall in line and I need to do what other people tell me to do. I am not inherently valuable. What makes me valuable is this God, this religion, this savior. this death of him and my compliance with that. And so I became the ultimate nice guy, people pleaser, completely non-existent as a separate entity. And the suffering that that created is something that I still process on a daily basis. And I love that I get to process it. And There’s a part of me that loves that I got to experience that suffering so deeply because no one can ever take that away from me. And I went there deeply. I based my life on these beliefs and they ended me in a place where I was contemplating more and more suicide. I didn’t want to be here anymore. I hated my life. I had a failing marriage. My children. didn’t want to be around me, didn’t respect me. I felt totally at a loss for how to connect with them and how to love them. Even though these things, my marriage and my fatherhood were so deeply important to me and things that I just longed to succeed at, it was like I could not figure it out. I could not connect with these people who were so precious to me. And it came to the point where about three and a half years ago, probably closer to four now, my wife just said, and it’s wild to look at the progression of it because for the whole 12 years leading up to that, she kept communicating like something’s wrong here. Like I’m not getting what I need. I don’t feel connected. I don’t feel loved. Like you’re mean and you’re, and yet I had built this religious structure around me where I could go. to church on Sunday and Wednesday, get a couple good handshakes, look a couple people in the eyes and say the right things and get the confirmation, ⁓ no, Ty’s a great guy. Everybody loves him. Everybody thinks he’s so amazing. And my bias was to listen to them over this crazy woman in my life, the only one in my life who was like, dude, something’s wrong. You’re messed up, dude. And yet I had all these other sources that were confirming, no, I’m a good guy. Everything’s good. Everything’s all right. And eventually 12 years into our marriage, things just came to a head. was infidelity and not to mention the infidelity that was going on all throughout through my porn addiction. And it came to the point where the word divorce actually came up as a real possibility. And what I experienced in that moment was a recognition that this facade that I had built was about to come crashing down and everyone was going to see who I really was. And that scared the shit out of me. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. It just, it’s interesting to hear this story. I definitely have a lot of clients with a similar story. I just wonder, like, it was like, almost like there’s this way in which in relationship or in, I know, I guess it’s not inevitable, but there’s some way in which something keeps poking at us that eventually we have to change. We have to change. We cannot continue. And it always comes back to this sense of like, it’s so much suffering not to be who we really are. So much suffering. And that keeps poking us until we have to, we collapse, we give up, and then we have to start to rebuild to be that. who we really are, or are we just, you know, I mean, unfortunately I think a lot of people, you know, they end their lives because they can’t be who they really are. I’m not a lot, but there’s a percentage of people that go that route, but it’s, it’s really, it’s so tragic. It’s so tragic. Yeah. Yeah. Man. I love the way you put that. And I feel that so deeply in my soul that I think a way that I would put it is whatever you want to call it. My term for what I used to call God is GRUS and it stands for good God, reality, universe, unity, source and spirit. And for me, Gruss just never gave up. Gruss will not give me satisfaction in anything other than the most beautiful, true, real version of me. And that is one of the new beliefs that I cling to and that I love because it It changes everything. It actually, makes it, it turns those negative things, those things that I used to feel like things that were against me. now see those things as so unbelievably for me. They are my opportunity to grow and remember and be who I actually am because I spent a lifetime building up shit that was not me. And now I’m in this process of. Just slowly peeling all that away and actually seeing who I am and my greatest opportunity there is those moments where it’s like, ⁓ shoot, I’m really sad right now. And I’m really angry right now. I’m really scared right now. Or I’m really joyous right now. And all those pieces that I never had access to before, because I didn’t allow myself to access those things. And now those things are. reminding me and giving me the opportunity to dig in. If I’m scared, well, why am I scared? It used to be, I avoided fear like the plague. Now I see fear as one of my greatest opportunities and teachers. it’s just life is a 180 degrees from what it was. And I love being here now. Good to hear. I’m so glad. So I’m curious. This was, said, kind of really that came to head about four years ago. And so that was really a tipping point where things had to change. And then kind of where are we at today? Or maybe you’d kind of catch us up a little bit of where things are now. You bet. Where am I at today as far as my relationship with my wife, my kids, just kind of all of it or. Yeah. Maybe, maybe there’s something in the middle there that It’s important. I don’t want to rush you through it. I’m just curious, like you’re sort of seeing like, wow, I’ve really made these big shifts in terms of how I’m relating to myself and how I’m seeing the world. And it feels like really transformative, but kind of what I’m curious about that path for the last few years that has sort of led you to this place. Yeah. I love the opportunity to kind of remember because it started for me. I moved out of the house. I lived in my van for. About three months. And right at that moment, I had had a book on my reading list for some time before that, a book by Jaco Willink called Extreme Ownership. And that was the perfect book for me to read in that moment, apparently. And what I learned from Jaco’s experience in battle, and I don’t condone war, battle, any of that. I’ve become very different from who I was when I read the book. And yet it’s so cool to see how perfect it was for me in the moment, because I would say that I was kind of a warmongering type person. And so this battle scarred hero writing this book about extreme ownership and getting to read that in my moment of crisis was so precious because what I realized in reading that book was that my reality is my responsibility. And if I’m the problem, I’m also the solution. And Jaco talks about if anything went wrong on his battlefield, he owned it. He owned, even if someone else made a mistake, he found a way to take ownership to say, Hey, I could have communicated better. And that for me in that moment was such a revelation, such a breath of fresh air, because I had externalized my power in every possible way. I had externalized my value in every possible way. I was completely dependent on everything and everyone around me. And what I gained in reading that book was the recognition that I’m powerful and I can create whatever I want. And it started for me with ownership for recognizing that I had created an environment where my wife was so disconnected. so desperate, so ⁓ heartbroken that she wanted nothing to do with me and she was so hurt and confused and that she was seeking love in other places. And I now look on that with such gratitude that she tried so hard for so long to communicate and to give me the opportunity to change And eventually it came to the point where it’s like, I’m done, man. I’ve got to find love somewhere. And as painful as that was, I now look on that with such gratitude and as one of the greatest gifts that I’ve ever received in my lifetime. And I will, I will spend the rest of my life thanking her for her courage and her power and her consistency and her love for me in all of that. So it started for me with ownership. And then it’s so beautiful to look back and to just recognize all these, what I would now call baby steps. And yet in the moment they felt like Mount Everest. Sure. Yeah, but they were massive, know, like scary. And one of the next big steps was joining a men’s group and getting the protection of powerful men who had done their work to be able to provide a safe place, to be able to provide a protected place for me to develop my own safety, my own internal safety. And it was a place where I could come out and say, I’m addicted to pornography. I am a kleptomaniac. I was stealing things left and right. My wife despises me. My kids don’t want to connect. Like the utter failure of my life. And to be held in that space by those men, not soothed, not like, ⁓ it’s okay, Ty, but so powerfully held and challenged and loved to say, it doesn’t have to be this way. And there is a path and there are steps that you can take to create what you want. And it’s, I’ve been on that path for the last four years ever since, and I love. My life, I love this path. Wow. That’s great. So I wanted to just double click on one part. It’s like, you know, that, way in which men can provide that clarity where it’s not, it’s not an avoidance or discounting, but it’s, it’s going right into it, right into it. Like, yep, this sucks. And what now you got to do something about it. think that’s it’s so beautiful about men’s groups is that there’s an accountability, but it’s not an accountability from shame or judgment or criticism. It’s an, it’s an accountability of like, we’re here, we’re on your side and you can do this. You got to change though. You can’t keep being like this. And then you start to make those short Mount Everest changes or it feels like Mount Everest changes, then slowly but surely you start to make the steps towards something new. So I just, really appreciate that. Yeah. Yeah. And one of the tiny little language shifts there that I really felt from these men too, is it’s what you said is accurate. You’ve got to change if you want to stay here and be among us. And there’s another sense in which a big part of my journey and my healing is that I don’t have to change. I actually could stay that way. I could stay the same person who was totally disconnected, totally addicted to all these things that were leading me to despair and death. And nothing would change about my inherent and innate value. And that to me is such a powerful truth because what that does is it actually deletes any shame. And now rather than this pressurized container that I have to become someone different or I’m just fucked. or I’m going to hell or I’m unvaluable now, it creates a whole different mindset, which is I get to change and I want to change and I love changing and I love becoming me. No pressure. I don’t have to, but I get to look at what old me created and be like, dude, I don’t like that. It becomes almost logical at that point. And as men being so logically minded, it’s like, ⁓ shoot, yeah. When I believed this, this was the result and I don’t like the result. So I’m not going to believe that anymore. Okay. So this all sort of come out of these last four years. And so where are you now? I’m curious, like in terms of your life, your kids, your wife, how’s that all shifted for you? Oh man. It’s 180 degrees from where it was. My wife and I are deeply. deeply connected, the conversations that I get to have with her on a daily basis now just blow my mind. So, so deeply intimate. Every day is an adventure. And don’t hear me say that there’s not still major, major struggles and major difficulties and major differences. The difference now is that, like I said earlier, the mindset is that those are for me. And so what that does is It opens my mind up to a creative mindset now. And now when I experienced those, like I said, those emotions, those traumas, the fears, the sorrows, even the joys and the pleasures, my mind now is able and not, not immediately. I’m still, I’m still learning to, to get there more quickly. And yet I get there way more quickly than I did at the beginning of this journey, that those things are for me. They are my greatest opportunity, greatest gift. And so I alchemize things that in my previous marriage, and when I say previous, I mean my marriage to the same woman, but previous to my awakening. Those things just went down in the history books as, well, that’s just another withdrawal from the account of love that will never be accounted for or fixed. just became. a part of the fabric of our relationship. Whereas now those major disagreements and pains and sorrows, we alchemize those within oftentimes hours, sometimes a day, maybe two days, but those things become little, I don’t know, maybe carns. I don’t know if you know the term carn, like when you’re hiking, little signposts or, or remembrances that we can look to and be like, Holy cow. Yeah. felt like, you know what carn is? Can you explain what it is? Yeah. carn is like a, like when you’re out hiking, it’s a trail marker that people put up to indicate where the trail is. It’s basically a stack of rocks. Yeah. Sometimes it could be like having a memorial element to it. Like sometimes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I love that. I love that image of just these carns on your life that help you in your journey. And they’re each little ones that Dictate the journey. think that’s really beautiful. Yeah. Yeah. It’s fun, man. It’s fun to be able to look at those and, see, Oh my gosh. I just turned what even in that moment, even like a couple of days ago, I had an experience like this where old old me kind of took the wheel and I felt this deep despair. Like, am I ever going to get what I want in this marriage? And just like deep, deep despair. And yet. the past four years of me training myself, deleting the shame, constantly conversing with powerful people, all of that training, all of that input and that like soaking in this new beauty and this new belief system and all of that kind of just activated. I was scared out of my mind and yet it just kind of activated into a point where it was like my body intuitively knew like you need to be vulnerable right now. You need to share what you’re feeling. That was totally off the table before. I couldn’t say I’m scared right now or I’m really hurt right. That was gone. That was not an option before. And it’s still very scary for me to do that. And yet in this moment, a couple of days ago, that training just took over and I did it. And within literally within 20 minutes, we were so connected. We were so in love. We were so like, it’s just like, whoa, man. I love this. Yeah. Yeah. I want to just give some really appreciating what you’re saying about like this movement from, I think you said externalizing your value, externalizing yourself into like everyone else gets to dictate you. You’re who you are because of everyone else. Like my value is because you love me. My value is because I did a good job and you think I did a good job to this way of like feeling like ownership of your life, this empowerment. I feel like that’s a very common experience I have in my work is that, you know, there’s a way in which the externalization is, it can be like, like a sense of identity. Like I’m not valuable unless you love me, but it’s also often in the form of blame. Like I can’t do who I want to be in because you were holding me back. And I think that this, this idea of ownership is so critical for men to say, I am going to create, I’m going to lead. I’m going to take. find my fierce masculinity and I’m going to take over and make this the way I need it to be. And I’m going to fully empower or I want to say fully embrace my wife’s struggles and complaints and issues and own it, just own it. Cause I think that’s what ends up happening. And I mean, I definitely do this too, is we’re so afraid to sit in the vulnerability of being seen as messing up. And it’s like small things. forgot the butter off or I really messed up. You know, like I did something terribly hurtful. We can’t sit in that. And so we blame, we shame ourselves. We shame other people. There’s all these defensive mechanisms that we use to get out of it. But once you can start to, and it’s not perfect, you don’t do it a hundred percent, you know, is all that obviously, but once you start to realize that I can own all of it, I can just take it all in and use it and use the word alchemize, which for me means It’s all coming in and it’s helping me turn all of this despair and shame and stuff into like this gold of growth. Yes. And I think that’s really what’s happening is that we have to really have that almost, I think, I don’t know if it has to be this way, but there’s almost like a breakdown and then was sort of awakening. And it’s like, then it’s like, really, I’m going to empower myself. And that’s really what I see with so many men that have, I think in many ways parallel your journey. is that I’m gonna do this. know, it’s a lot of my work is to help men to see like, you’re the one that’s gonna do this. I’m not here with your wife. I’m not gonna change your wife. I’m gonna get your wife to be better. I’m not gonna get your kids to be better. I’m not gonna get your parents to be better. You’re the one and you’re the only one. But in taking responsibility for our lives, it just, changes the whole game. Yeah. And what a lie it was to ever believe anything other than that. And it’s intriguing to me. Like where does that lie start for different people? For me, it started with hell and the religion and someone else scaring me so much that it was like, Oh, I can’t trust myself. Oh, I’m not, I don’t have innate value. I don’t know what’s going on here. And yeah, it’s intriguing to me to recognize though, that there’s so many people, so many men. probably women too, who didn’t necessarily have the religious background and yet still have that same feeling. It makes me think that maybe there’s a biological mandate there happening where it’s like, we’re always looking for the tiger. We’re always looking for what’s going to kill us. And it feels like we’re moving past that. It feels like there’s a big move happening where we’re going to overcome that. mean like we’re always looking for reasons why Like to be afraid, to be scared of our circumstances or where we’re at. And then that fear leads us to want to attach to systems that aren’t always the healthiest systems. Like a religious system or something. Yeah. And to me it’s rampant. It’s not just Christianity. It’s not just Islam. It’s Republicanism. It’s Democratism. capitalism, it’s like, these are all to me, religions that we all attach ourselves to, to protect ourselves. Sure. Yeah. No, think it’s actually kind of hard to be fully engaged with our fundamental truth, like our real sense of ourself. I think it’s actually quite uncomfortable, least maybe the journey there. I find it actually quite beautiful and humbling to be in that space at this point, but I think it’s scary for people. so people are looking for some kind of structured thing that will give them the answers to everything. And all of these things are some sort of answer to that. But it’s always a hollow answer. It never really sort of fulfills what we’re looking for. so, you know, the thing I was saying earlier is that I think there’s just this constant kind of itch, sometimes an itch, sometimes it’s like a scream that’s telling us you’re not being who you really are. Keep going. You’re not who you really are. And sometimes it’s really painful. You know, there’s substance abuse and all kinds of other things that we do to kind of fake it. But inevitably there’s a pull in our sort of human life towards that sense of growth and becoming our fullest self and that we can’t get away from. I really don’t think we can get away from that. Yeah. Which is beautiful. It’s baked in. It’s like, it’s beautiful that it’s baked into the whole evolutionary process. ⁓ I love it. It gives me so much hope to recognize that there’s another sense for me. Part of my old belief too, was that time was limited. And so if I didn’t get it figured out in this next 90 years, again, I’m fucked. Yeah. Either I’m going to heaven or I’m going to hell. And I don’t believe that anymore. You know, like the amount of suffering that I accumulate on this earth, I think goes with me wherever I go next. And all it is, it’s like suffering. don’t see good and evil anymore. I see everything leading to bliss and beauty and even the suffering that I am massed in my own experience in this lifetime, this go around or however, whatever you think about it. mean, I’ve already just in one lifetime, I’ve alchemized that suffering into this whole new paradigm where I live in bliss far more than I did before. And so. When I extrapolate that into eternity and more, more time beyond when my body is going to be here. It’s like, dude, even if you suffer a whole lifetime, I’m okay. Like I don’t want you to, and I’m here to be a light and to like do whatever I can to help you jump off of that suffering cycle. And yet if you spend a whole life suffering here, that’s okay. You’re going to be fine. It’s okay. We have this limited perspective of what’s going on here. And that to me is part of what scares the shit out of us is like, I only got 90 years. ⁓ my God. And talk about pressure and pressure then leads to fear and fear leads to a closed mind and a closed mind can’t think about how to actually create what we want. And so that’s one of those beliefs where I’m just like, that belief doesn’t lead me where I want to go. So I’m fucking done with it. Yeah. I’m curious. Like. One of the things that I think is challenging for people who either didn’t have any kind of religious spiritual development, you know, just lived a very secular life or people who’ve come out of that world and have decided that that’s not their right way. Like one of the things I think is hard is like finding some kind of North star in your life that allows you to kind of know where you’re going. Yeah. I think about like religion and even some spiritual traditions, it’s like it gives you some sense of like, this is what you need to do. And I think it’s hard for people to be in the world and have a little bit more of an amorphous, like I’m just going to be me. And I think that’s what’s hard. And so as much as we’re sort of here talking about the challenges of religion, I think what it does provide often is a sense of here’s your North star. And I those North stars can be somewhat distorted as we’re talking about today. But I think in the loss of that, you know, in our more, I think increasingly secularized world, it really makes it hard for people to feel some kind of grounded connection to the sacred. And that is a huge loss. And so then in the absence of that, I’m just curious, like, I don’t think you’ve, sounds to me like you’ve created or not necessarily created, but you’ve maintained the good elements of that. Well, maybe letting go some of the shameful, painful elements of your upbringing. I’m just curious if you could talk a little bit about. how that’s been for you of maintaining some kind of North star in your life. Yeah, I love that. I’ve been thinking about this more lately. A big part of the process of healing and growth for me, one of the mile markers or the indicators that I am healed is when I can go back to my abuser with completely open arms and complete love and just, and I wouldn’t say that I’m fully there yet. And yet I’m on that path and that love is growing. so part of that process for me is recognizing the beauty in my upbringing and recognizing how valuable it really was and how it actually made me who I am today, who is this person who is so much more blissful and so much more excited about life. And maybe I wouldn’t be here today had I not gone through the goods and the bads. of my upbringing and of my religion, former religion. And so the way that I’ve contextualized that in my life is I see religion as a foothold. If we’re to take the analogy of like climbing El Capitan and this sheer rock face, envision that as our life. And as I’m climbing this daunting, unbelievably massive, challenging endeavor. Religion to me is, it’s a foothold and it’s something that, that I was able to grasp onto that gave me some beautiful truths and some opportunity to feel and to explore and to actually experience, ⁓ okay. Here’s Christianity. Like I’m doing it. I’m actually here and I’m holding onto it and I’m believing it and I’m acting. based on those beliefs. And I think what I recognize though is that religion is always only ever that. Religion is not the end goal because religion is by its very nature limited. And I don’t believe that I am limited. I don’t believe that you are limited. I believe that we are eternal, infinite beings. And so I got the opportunity to experience Christianity and now it’s like when I was young, it was a handhold. When I got a little bit older, it was a foothold as I moved up and now I’m moving on to something different and I’m not even standing on it. Does that mean that I don’t love Jesus Christ and the message and so many of the stories and so many beautiful things from the Bible and so many of the amazing experiences that I’ve had and the amazing things that Christianity has produced in this world? Absolutely not. I love those things. But my life is no longer based on those things. I’ve climbed beyond it. And that’s also to say that like, I have new religions now in a sense, and they are religions of my own making. And my hope and my desire is that those now are my handhold. And in a couple years, they will be my foothold. And I will progress past those things eventually. That’s kind of the way that I contextualize that stuff now. Yeah, that makes sense. Do you feel like you have beyond sort of the kind of the growth element of your life? Like it sounds like that’s kind of what you’re saying. Like you’re going to keep growing. You’re going to discover new ideas and new things. You’re going to keep growing, which is beautiful. I wonder if there’s like a way in which you have some kind of essential philosophy or way of seeing the world that really kind of keeps you grounded or in line with, you your turn of divine essence. think you’re talking about the sense of divine essence and like, that’s where, you know, know, truth resides. Cause you know, I think it’s kind of easy to be in that in some ways, but there’s also times where I like what you’re saying about suffering and the challenges of life being a way to continue to use that. to grow, but I think for a lot of people, it’s those times where we need some kind of grounded sense of ourselves, you know, whether it’s a religion or spiritual tradition, whatever it is, it’s like when I’m really suffering, I need that. I need something to feel. need that toe hold. So I just wonder for you, if there’s like a real sense of like, this is the thing that I really can depend on in those challenging times. Man, I mean, there’s so many different things that come to mind. It’s hard to pinpoint right now. And that may be part of the indication that like, I’m actualized or realized or I’m not done growing. But for me, I would say that bliss is kind of a central theme. have a belief that bliss is my natural state. It is what I’m created for and why I’m here and it’s my birthright. It’s who I actually am. And so. If ever I’m outside of bliss, and that’s where other pieces, other answers to your question kind of come in. Now I have this thing, okay, bliss is who I really am. Anytime that I’m outside of bliss, anytime that I’m experiencing stress or fear or anger or trauma, any of these things that all those are to me now, and this is another belief that plays into that whole system for me, all those are opportunities. And along with that, there’s so many pieces to this kind of, for lack of a better word, religion that I’m building for myself that I use in those moments where I don’t feel grounded. I mean, one of the things that I am discovering is what I call superpowers. We were told by Hollywood that superpowers are what Superman has. He can fly, he can laser beam people, he can, you all these crazy things. And yet what I’m realizing in my life is that. I am full of superpowers. And the definition of a superpower to me now is it’s available to me in every moment that I’ve ever existed or ever will exist. It’s available to everyone in every moment. Maybe that’s the full definition. It’s things like vulnerability. It’s things like breath. It’s things like curiosity and courage and creativity. Like these things are available to me in every moment that I’ve ever existed and yet they were unknown to me and unavailable to me. And now they are available to me and I get to pull them out and use them in those moments where I don’t feel grounded, where I feel scared. And the effect is it’s 180 degrees from where I was before. Wow. Yeah. That’s great. Well, Ty, I just want to take a moment to thank you. I wanted to ask Before we end though, is there a place where people can find you? Yeah, I am. I’ve got a website, wholeman.org. wholeman.org, okay. Yeah. And then I’m on Instagram and Facebook, Instagram. I just actually changed my name and I didn’t even tell you, Bryce, it’s weird. And, but I now refer to myself as Cowl. And so my Instagram page is Cowl I am. If anyone’s interested. Okay. Cowl I am. Is it C-O-W-L? ⁓ no, it’s actually C-C-O-W-L. C-C-O-W-L. Yeah. Yeah. Great. Okay. Well, thank you so much for being here today. It’s been such a pleasure to connect with you and spend time with you. It’s been a while since I’ve seen you. Sometimes connect on WhatsApp for just brief texting, but it’s just really great to see you in person. I appreciate you being on the show today. Right. Thanks. Thanks for having me. I love your presence, man. love your gentleness. feel connected to you and I love you. I love you too, man. Thanks so much. Thank you. Thank you for listening today. Please take a moment to like and follow so we can continue to change the world by changing ourselves. Have a wonderful day.