The changing gender roles that men and women play in our world continue to change rapidly.
However, as these changing gender roles in the economy have changed, there has not always been a corresponding shift in the way men and women have learned to relate.
I can think of how my grandfather and grandmother related to each other.
My grandfather believed himself to be the most important member of the family. He thought his wife was there to serve him. My grandfather would say demeaning and inappropriate things to her as if she had a duty to take his immature behavior.
…the current crisis in gender relations is simply that in the last thirty years, women’s roles have radically transformed while men’s have not. ~Terry Real
My mother and father had a much healthier way of being with each other.
Much of this came after they got married. They committed to the hard, sustained work of fine tuning how they relate to changing gender roles much differently than their parents had done it. They were able to find ways they could get along and support each other emotionally. I was lucky to have parents who modeled both the difficulties of relationships and the willingness to do what it took to get better at it.
For most us men we struggle through each day attempting to make it without any real idea of how to show up in a relationship.
We are reactive, defensive and come with a lot of baggage. It doesn’t have to be this way. We can learn the skills of mindfulness, emotional intimacy, vulnerability and compassion. When we begin to move towards ourselves, and loosen some of the emotional armoring we have been putting in place most of our lives, we begin to feel a deeper intimacy that translates to healthier relationships.
It can be so much better. Contact me to find authenticity in your relationships.
Wishing you the day you need to have. – Bryce